About Us

We are a queer mom (Gail) and a trans dad (Ezekiel), parents to Leigh, born 6/06 (via Gail) and Ira, born 5/09 (via Ezekiel, pre-transition). We blog about the challenges of building and sustaining a queer family. We started this blog in 2008, when we were trying to conceive our second child and our family contained two moms. After taking a break from blogging in 2012 as we figured out how to navigate Ezekiel’s transition, we decided to come back, and fill in more of the story. Writing from both our two-mom form and current mom-dad form is included here, with the older writing under Ezekiel’s old pseudonym (Lyn). We love hearing from other parents, and thinking about all the ways we’re exactly the same and completely different, so please email us at firsttimesecondtime at gmail dot com.

The best way to get to know us is to take a trip through the archives. To read from the start of Ezekiel’s transition, start here. Some of our best writing is on being a queer non-gestational parent or a lesbian non-bio-mom, taking turns for which parent is pregnant, and our thoughts on donor conception, or you can just start with some of our best posts.

Do you think you might know us in real life? You probably do. It’s not that hard to tell who we are. We write under pseudonyms here, but we love it when friends and family read (really!). So feel free to read, comment, and talk to us about anything that comes up here.