Today I took the day off, and at some point during the day it hit me how grateful I am for my life and my family. I am grateful that:
- When my 6yo daughter asked me to explain a sign advertising Cookies, Condoms, and Conversation while we were walking through a college campus I didn’t even flinch.
- My 3yo son wants to have long hair like Doris from Girlyman right now and to grow up to be a man like Nate from Girlyman because Nate wears flowered shirts. (We used this desire as a way to convince him that he really should let us wash and comb his hair.)
- My 6yo is sure that she wants to have a family with two kids and two moms when she grows up. She’s also sure she’s going to be a scientist and a trumpet player. My 3yo is going to be a librarian who brings people coffee and is also going to be a Mama who plays drums in a band.
- My kids understand that gender is a tricky thing and that it sometimes happens that people who appear to be one gender at birth end up being another gender, that some people are a little of both genders, that they are the ones that get to determine their gender, and that if you aren’t sure what pronouns to use for a person you can ask, but that you shouldn’t ask nosy questions (the 6yo is the nosiest person on the world, so even though she knows that I’m not sure how well its working in practice).
- My 6yo thinks that Lyn/Ezekiel and I should come to her school and kiss in front of her classmates because they all think that kissing is gross and she things if they saw me and Lyn/Ezekiel kiss, they’d agree that kissing is really good.
- My spouse recently came out as trans and he’s looking hot enough to make me swoon.
- My two young kids understand the basics of how babies are made, how and why people adopt, how donor conception works, that sex and procreation are not the same thing, and what masturbation is (and that it’s something to be done in private, not in the living room).
In sort, my life is radical, amazing, and queer in a way that feels wonderfully quotidian as well, and it’s all because I get to be in a family with three of the most amazing people I can imagine.